Why do women like rough sex and what is the nature of these fantasies?

Despite the natural softness, many women enjoy hot sex. Sometimes a woman’s requests in bed can be confusing or misunderstood. Many people think of BDSM porn, where a woman is caressed and whipped during sex.

Why do women enjoy rough sex, are women’s real-life fantasies similar to those shown in adult films, and what is the nature of these fantasies?

How can you tell if a woman is inclined to have rough sex, what types of passionate sex do she enjoy, and what men prefer? Hard sex rules that will help both partners to enjoy.

Why do women like hard sex?

It is important to set boundaries for understanding what hard sex is. There is definitely no domestic humiliation or violence under this concept. Hard sex is limited by the partners’ sexual life and cannot go beyond it. 

Usually, in rough sex, the woman plays the role of the submissive victim, and the man acts as the dominant. It doesn’t always have to be painful, it doesn’t have to humiliate or be humiliated. The psychological component prevails here – submission, domination, a combination of strength and weakness, tenderness and toughness. All feelings hide behind uncontrollable passion, partners have sex, succumbing to natural needs.

Passionate rough sex excites women, because all people in one way or another have animal instincts. The most dominant among them are hunger, fear, desire to mate. Men are much stronger than women sexually and physically, and this turns women on in bed. 

They want to feel the strength of a resolute man, to be weak and defenseless. This does not mean that every woman loves hard games in bed. Sometimes, on the contrary, women like to dominate a man and feel superior to him.

How to identify a woman’s tendency to play rough in bed

There are criteria according to which you can “diagnose” a woman’s love of rough sex.

  • She loves it when a man makes decisions for her. At the same time, she tries to satisfy any whim of a man. She perceives hard sex as a kind of gratitude for her care for a man.
  • She loves variety. This can manifest itself not only in sexual relationships, but also in many other areas of life. True, most likely, such a woman not only loves sex “with a sharp edge”, but also does not mind sometimes changing roles with a man and picking up a whip.  
  • She is inherent in the role of the victim. Sometimes life situations develop in such a way that women get used to moral masochism. Of course, this also carries over into sex life.
  • She looks unavailable. She will enjoy the fact that a man achieves her, and will never give up “the first time”. When a man does achieve it, enchanting sex will await him, which does not exclude the manifestation of rudeness.

Victim or hunter?

If a woman understands male psychology, she will definitely play along with her partner. She will demonstrate to him that she also wants to have rough sex, will try, moan expressively and beg him to be more tender.

All this is in order to maintain the fire of passion in a man and turn it on even more. And a man after such sex will surround her with love and care to show how dear she is to him.

At the same time, sex can remain rough – partners will prefer to immediately start intercourse, skipping long caresses and kisses. Let it be just a little sex, but – stormy, passionate, furious, exciting and maddening. Men who do not like hard sex are quite rare (although there are some). 

Why men like rough sex

It is important for men to feel that they are in charge, and hard sex is one of the ways to demonstrate their superiority and strength to a partner.

Most men engage in this type of sex because this is how they psychologically transfer their dominant experience to sexual relations. If a man cannot realize his superiority in one relationship, he will certainly implement them somewhere on the side.

In some cases, rough sex turns men on, as there are no unnecessary feelings and tenderness in it, which are inappropriate, for example, in an easy relationship.

Types of rough sex

  • Sudden and fast.

This is one of the classic options for rough sex when a man “come and take”. At the same time, a woman may not suspect anything at all, and a man can catch her at any activity and lean against the wall, or bend her onto the table. For a greater extravaganza of feelings, you can shovel all objects off the table with your hand, tie your partner’s hands, etc. One of the possible options for such sex can be a sharp coercion of a woman to a blowjob. You just need to be sure that she will like it, and observe hygiene.

  • Physical impact.

It doesn’t have to be hard spanking or BDSM. If you haven’t practiced this kind of thing before, start by nibbling, lightly hitting soft spots. You can gently grab a woman by the throat or squeeze her breasts. But do not forget, the female body is a very delicate system, and you need to correctly calculate the strength of the impact.

  • Using harsh words

If you remember the phrase that women love with their ears, then you can “warm up” your partner quite well, and excite her even more. Call her a dirty word or two and she will moan with pleasure.

  • Bindings

How exactly the partner will be connected, in whole or in part, depends on your imagination. You can gag her mouth, blindfold her, or tie her hands. In a defenseless state, a woman’s arousal will only increase.

Rough sex rules

Engaging in passionate hard sex, it is important to understand that arousal can pass, but traces of your unbridled passion can remain on your partner and remind you of yourself for a long time. It’s good if the painful sensations after hard sex are pleasant and just remind you of the night before. But if in the process something was done incorrectly, then a very unpleasant imprint may remain in the memory. 

  • Don’t forget about lubrication . Sometimes, with the rapid development of events, the female body does not have time to release the required amount of natural lubrication. Because of this, the risk of injury to the genitals increases. Make sure there is enough lubricant – buy lubricant from a pharmacy or specialty store. Oils and petroleum jelly are not suitable for such purposes – they stain surfaces and are unsafe for the delicate mucous membrane of the genitals. The best choice for the act of passionate sex is a water-based lubricant.

This rule is even more true if the couple is practicing anal sex. “Thanks” to the influence of the porn industry, hard sex is associated with anal sex, which is impossible without prior preparation.

  • Stop word – useful if the couple decided to practice very rough sex. In the process, overplaying, the partner may not take seriously the pleas of his beloved, as a result – injure her. Therefore, agree in advance about such a word that both partners will easily remember, after which your sex will definitely stop. So you will have the opportunity to solve a possible problem, you just have to use your stop word in time.  
  • Remember to protect yourself . If you practice hard sex with a fickle partner or are not sure about his health, be sure to use a condom. It minimizes the risks of infection with diseases of the reproductive system.


Rough sex is a good opportunity to add some variety to your partners’ sex lives. 

For some, this practice will be new, but for some couples it will become commonplace. To make hard sex comfortable and not unpleasant, use the voiced rules and do not forget about caution.

event_note December 14, 2021

account_box Dr. John Provet

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *